My Lifeline


It’s ridiculously late & I am still awake. I made the fatal mistake of drinking a very strong mug of extra caffeinated (my request at the time) Chai tea this afternoon after 5 days off caffeine. Is my system this sensitive ? Christ. Delicate feels more appropriate. Eventually, my eyes will close, but in the interim… I write.
And I realize this has always been my life line. A side bar for everything. It has always soothed me, calmed me, quieted me. It has been my solace and my company. A best friend when all else is gone. I take it everywhere and anywhere. And more than anyone or anything else in my entire life, it has been available to me and for me- always. Every single time. No debating. No coaxing. No hoping or even waiting. Just the one facet of life that has always remained by my side, no matter what.
I have poems from when I was nine years old right into teenage years. I even wrote a song at 12. There’s only one person in the entire world who knows all the lyrics other than me. Believe me, the melody & lyrics were easy. It’s the fact that we could carry this so far into adulthood and remember it, that’s more shocking. The mind is still intact. That is refreshing and a relief.

Writing has carried me throughout life. Words were the one place I could run to when I needed a reprieve, a rest or a place to hide and feel safe. They helped me clarify an issue, decipher a problem. They allowed me to bare my soul and be as raw as I needed to be without defense, because I knew I needed none. They never talked back, were never unkind, insensitive or disappointing.
Without reservation, I can honestly say that there were times writing has saved my mind & perhaps on some occasions, my life. They gave me a voice when I thought I had none. They helped give me the voice for other people as well. I’ve been asked to write bio’s, response’s to important letters, dating profiles, even a poem and love note for them to give away.
Language. I love words. I love using them and playing with them. They seem to love me back because most often, I get a very positive response to them. I love moving them across the page. I trust my writing. My words. The more I write, the more I write.
This has given me the outlet to be my total flawed self, perfect in my imperfections. It has been & remains to be that one constant in my life. It has been the longest love affair I have ever had where I still craved more. The longest affair I have never tired of. The longest love affair I have yet to give up. And it is the one love affair, no matter who else walks through my life, I ever will.

Advertisements

About aboomersvoice

First and foremost, I'm a baby boomer and damn proud of it. The ones reading this post survived. Some didn't..We are the generation that crashed through barriers, broke through the norm and made our own rules. We paved the way for others to follow their bliss. One of the largest breakthroughs was probably equal rights and opportunities for women. Thank you Gloria Steinem and Betty Friedan. We burned our bras, well, most of us did. We marched against politics we didn't believe in, staged protests not knowing we could easily be silenced by a bullet, experimented with drugs, meditation and guru's. We traveled with backpacks across the country and throughout the world..We had a voice. We had a choice. We had a mission. We had freedom and we were united. I am a writer, traveler, explorer, observer and participant in life. I am part of the expansion of baby boomers who still believe in the original message of peace and love. Take this journey.with me. Who knows where it will take us next ?
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to My Lifeline

  1. I’m glad you’ve found such comfort in words and writing. It’s good to have a friend like that.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s